Circling the Block

Random thoughts on the life of a writer…

I’m staring at my monitor, pondering the ending of my latest novel. It’s just not coming to me. There is no such thing as an original thought, I remind myself, legs stinging and tingling. I wiggle my toes, fiddling with the nail on my pinky. There isn’t enough left of it to nibble. I’d better cancel my manicure. Doris will keel over at the sight… or, charge me double. My gaze wanders, resting briefly on the crisp brown leaves on the one stem left of my wilting plant. Another one bites the dust, I think, looking away, drumming my fingers on the desk. Ending…ending…gotta have an ending.

What’s that in the corner? A cobweb the size of a fisherman’s net has snared a wad of dog hair big enough to make a dust bunny cringe. The wispy fur ball swirls like a tornado when the fan kicks on. My vacuum would make quick work of it. I should clean the house. My mother-in-law’s bound to stop by later, with her white gloves. I glare balefully at my monitor. I’ve got a deadline, darn it! I need my ending. Nothing. Maybe I should shelve it for awhile and do something else. The bottom of the oven’s starting to look like a fire pit.

Any of that sound familiar? I call it the ‘writer’s circle’. It’s where we circle around, rather than getting to the point. That brings to mind one of my favorite life lessons that I learned well…though my figure begs to differ. It goes something like this. Get your butt up and get to work. Avoidance breeds anxiety, anxiety increases hand-to-mouth disease, hand-to-mouth disease leads to Fat-Buttitis (FB) and Flabby-Thigh-Syndrome (FTS), which leads to whining. No one likes a whiner …so get your butt up and get to work.

Snivelers take heed! Writing is not for the weak. It is hard work. The road to success is often paved with insult, embarrassment and heightened vulnerability. The ‘highs’ are euphoric, the ‘lows’ enough to make you so depressed you slump down in your recliner, candy bar in hand, weeping (as your thighs expand to fill up the seat). Well, put down that chocolate! Wipe your nose, crack your knuckles and pick up your pen! I plan to...as soon as I polish off this last chunk of chocolate.

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